Hello to all my family and friends. This past month has been crazy, crazy!!! We have been worked hard and we have played hard!! Here are some pictures from indoor rock climbing (super scary, but super fun), my friend Mike with a pucker face (not duck lips!), Paulo and his buddy Tanner (Tantan), Crazy Days Maze, and Halloween!!! Enjoy!! This last months has been full of ups and downs but I am so grateful to have such wonderful people in my life. This month I was also blessed to be able to watch General Conference in a quiet home. Although it would have been good for the kids. Let's see... My boys, the Green Bay Packers have had a bit of a rough thime this season but have picked up their game and are 5-3. One loss was to the Seahawks which was a total CRIME!!! If you could catch a player from the opposing team who was holding the ball and make a touchdown for your team, hmmm.... that would chnage the history of footbal itself. Thankfully the real Refs are back and we won't have horrible calls, just some bad calls. Hope it isn't too late for my boys to qualify for the Superbowl.... we shall see. Welcome November. We are looking forward to seeing the family this year for Thanksgiving and Christmas!!! We are totally stoked.

October/Halloween!!! Yay, Fun Times!!!!

So my big boy got his wolf badge last Wednesday. He is so big! I am so proud of him!!!

Just Chillin' like a Villain!!!

Fabiana and I are staying up to watch a little "girl TV." Love my princess. Talking about the move and all it entailed. So here we are in Charlotte again after a brief hiatus in Concord. We are glad to be back but facing some of the many challenges of changing schools after it has already commenced. I even forgot to do an address change with the post office until a week after the move. Ooops... oh well. It'll get here at some point. Plus my neighbor Jen is moving in and she can give me whatever failed to make it back. I am looking forward to conference weekend. It seems I have been blessed so to speak not to have the kids so that I can listen. Although, it would be goof for them. Well, more to follow.

So I am going through a few more issues with custody and have had many tings to think about. Once I was done and I prayed with the kids, these are the words that I want to share: Abiss; Once again, I find myself alone. The solace and silence of which I have become so prone. I try and remember that I am not by myslef, That He has not forgotten me on some shelf. He always has me in mind, With blessings in store, rich and kind. But how do I open my eyes to see, And push away all that worries that scare me? How do I leave this great abiss? How do I allow myself to feel my child's tender kiss? I have to be strong so that they won't feel, The brunt and the hurt that I kill when I kneel. Please, Lord give me the power this day, To endure all thou hast to put into my way. Just one note, I will ask no more, Please give me to patience to love and to hold, My dear little loved ones past when I grow old.

The Beauty Within

Beauty comes and beauty goes, At least that beauty that makes the skin glow. A friend told to look deep within, To see what I was emanating. I unravel and take apart what’s intertwined, To find what I have inside. I try to be careful and not compare, My beauty is different and not easy to share. I look to what I admire in others, And know that could not ever smother. My beauty is special and unique to yours, I pattern my soul to be even more. Although I try hard I have some scars, That taints my beauty and feel that it mars. So I look to you my friend and try to radiate, That beauty within you that makes everyone wants to emulate.

Monkeys: Four little monkeys live with me, Makes me work and fill me with glee. The sacrifice and constant in trepidation, Which I feel to feed and care and set regulation. So they coax and persuade with great frustration, Knowing they will not get any degradation. They run and they jump and they make me insane, They break and they hit and they are never to blame. So I join in the fun and decide to give in, For there is no better joy that can be found within.

Friend: The brilliance of your words which shine, Reminds me of a time left behind. When I once knew what I enjoyed, And always spent the time employed. To put to words my every thought, And dance and sing and do what I ought. Those days had passed but now renewed, And I will do what I should without a feud. To grow and flourish and overcome by inspiration, Is a longing I have and motivation. Will you help me will you muse me, In my journey to infuse me. To enlighten and in vigor, My life’s dreams and plans I have figured. I have felt my heart to swell, I am so happy, please pray tell. What shall I write, what shall I sing, What shall I do to give my heart wings. What shall I share, what shall I write, To show how grateful I am upon this night.

Forgive Myself: As I ponder the growth I have made, I try not to dwell on the regretted escapades. I look to see what was learned, And see how that can help me attain what I yearn. Those moments of hope and faith and fear, Have all but helped me make things clear. Will I ever know what I am meant for? Will I ever know why I have less or more? Will I ever understand His plan? Why I feel I am left by every man? I know that only time will tell, If I will ever allow my heart to swell. Will I ever allow my heart to heal? And once again to learn how to feel. Oh how my heart is scared, To feel once more the pain unpaired. If he comes how will I know, How will I learn to let go. Not all men are the same, I feel the overwhelming power of disdain. I loved and lost and did a second time, I don’t know how to live the lie, That I no longer trust myself, And feel that I don’t deserve that wealth. Will I ever learn to trust, I know to move forward that I must. Please heaven help this abandoned heart, And help me free my soul in part, To help me on this life long journey to find my love, And finally find a friend from above.

To Be Like Him: Today is the day I have challenged a change, A change that will lead and guide and maintain. I hope to move forward and never derail, I have a lot of work do to never get stale. I wish to see the change in me that reflects His image, To see Him mold me and shape me to win each and every scrimmage. At the end of my journey I hope He will say, “You have pleased me in every way, every day!” I know I have power to say this will ensue, But need to ensure that I always be true. It won’t happen today or tomorrow to be plain, But working diligently every day to be sustain. The progress I make I will write and take record, Te see where I am failing and never to let go. Sometimes I will fall be greatly discouraged, But moving and pressing I will do my best to flourish. I know that He loves me and has paid the ultimate price, But I have a duty to make it all right. To never forget or to take it for granted, His love for me will always be branded. He has done His part and now it is my turn, To work ever so hard to and always to learn. So I take my leave as I start on this journey, To return to His kingdom and always be yearning. ~Ana Bo Bana